I do have a glimpse of heaven story to tell. But first a few thoughts. I finished reading John Paul II's Apostolic Letter On the Christian Meaning of Human Suffering. It was a short 56 pages but FILLED with richness. As I have been earning my "PhD" on suffering, this letter particularly enlightenened me on a couple beautiful points on suffering. The ground work that needs to first be established is that John Paul II experienced MUCH suffering in his life, tragic, long term, slow term, all terms. He definitely has ground to write about suffering in the light that he does. It is all incredibly hope-filled and amazing coming from a man who experienced and witnessed IMMENSE suffering. The first revelation that made my soul's eye open a little more was this - "suffering is present in the world in order to release love, in order to give birth to works of love towards neighbor, in order to transform the whold of human civilization into a 'civilization of love.' " That is a profound statement. Suffering produces LOVE. I remember making a comment after Stella died and being deeply touched by so many people. Their works, their actions, words, their vulnerability and openness to me. It was so beautiful, so...human. People I had only known on the "surface" and they only me on the "surface," shared moments that only come from deep within. It was real beauty. I remember saying, "Why does it take things like this to make us so vulnerable and really loving with one another?" So yes, I see how suffering births love. Suffering is neccessary for love to be released. Amen!!
The second point that woke my soul more was this, "This is the meaning of suffering, which is truly supernatural and at the same time human. It is supernatural because it is rooted in teh divine mystery of the Redemption of the world, and it is likewise deeply human because in it the person discovers himself, his own humanity, his own dignity, his own mission...revealing of man to himself and making his supreme vocation clear...It also happens - as experience proves - that this can be particularly dramatic. But when it is completely accomplished and becomes the light of human life, it is particularly blessed. 'Through Chirst and in Christ, the riddles of sorrow and death grow meaningful." WOW! Suffering allows a person to discover himself, or often what we say "find out what one's made of." Through this discovery a person, a soul finds his\her mission, his\her supreme vocation. God has one for each soul from the moment He calls it into being. Jesus had a divine purpose God had for Him, But we must remember WE ALL DO. For a closer look at a unique soul's purpose please check out the blog - iwillcarryyou.wordpress.com.
Now for my heaven story. Johnny was laying on the couch with my mother in law. She was resting and he seemed tired too. I went up stairs to put some laundry away with Gia. I hadn't heard a peep downstairs and I figured he must have fallen asleep too. I looked down the stairs and he was just laying there with his eyes open, maybe day dreaming. Later that afternoon, we were outside playing. Both of the children were up in the tree. I was standing next to Gia. I found a star in the grass and gave it to her. I said, "Gia, did you see Stella today?" I always ask her that. I asked again smiling and nuzzling into her chunks. John solemnly responded, "I did. I saw Stella." Johnny is very "guy" like in his thinking. Practical. He doesn't like when I make jokes to him or use figures of speech. Anyways, this caught my attention. "When did you see her?" I asked. "I saw her in my dream, but with my eyes." I didn't really understand. I assumed he meant when he was sleeping last night. As we went back in forth about when this happened. He made it clear when he said, "You know, when I was laying on the couch with Nonna." He saw her with the eyes of his soul and didn't know how else to describe it. I asked what she was doing. "She was in an ocean petting a shark, but the shark was not mean. And the water was gold and silver." I asked wanting to hear more "Did she say anything to you?" "Yes" he replied. "She said, 'Johnny, you will be in heaven tomorrow.' And, 'I love you Johnny...and Gia." I smiled at him and said, "Johnny, I'm so glad you got to see Stella, but I'm even more glad that you are learning to use the eyes of your soul to see. That is praying Johnny and I'm so proud of you!" I huggged him and peace wrapped us both in our embrace. Meanwhile, Gia is yelling over and over "Lella! Lella! Lella!" for Stella. It was all so sweet.